Lord of the Victory

You are God who fills me with a thousand songs,

And I will sing praise to You!

 

You are God who delivers me.

You are God who lifts me up from the pit,

From the muck and mire that hold me fast,

And threaten to suck me under.

You are God who plucks me out,

Of the despair and destruction in my soul,

That I cannot escape.

 

You are God who lifts up my soul,

And sets my feet upon solid ground.

You are God who plants my feet,

Firmly on You,

And I stand in a broad place.

 

Behold,

The lines have fallen for me in pleasant places,

And I have a beautiful inheritance. 

 

God who plucks me out of despair,

And delivers me from that which wars,

To destroy my soul.

God who picks up my heart,

And reminds me of my song.

God who fills my breast,

With joy and melody.

 

And my heart soars.

High on eagle’s wings,

My heart soars.

 

My God has delivered me.

And I will sing it.

 

For none could deliver me,

But You.

None could see,

Nor answer,

The raging conflict,

But You.

 

You are God,

Who makes my steps firm underneath me.

You are God,

Who brings me out into a spacious place.

 

You are God,

Who takes my broken feet out of the mire,

Thick as cement,

And sets them upon their high places,

And makes me leap here,

Like a deer.

 

You are God,

Who fills my breast,

With Spirit and life.

Your words to me,

They are Spirit,

And they are life.

 

Your Spirit,

Breathes for me,

In the deepest places where I despair,

And cannot breathe.

 

Almighty God,

You do in me,

That which is impossible.

Almighty God,

You are more beautiful,

Than I could hope to catch with words,

Or express,

With highest melody.

 

You are God,

And You fill my breast with joy.

And all I want to do,

Is breathe You in,

And laugh for joy,

And run,

And dance,

And sing praises to You,

Until my chest explodes,

And I finally soar,

Up into the fullness of who You are.

 

You make me want to fill my lungs,

And praise You,

Until my heart swells so much,

That It floats heavenward,

And crosses all this world,

That still divides us.

 

You make me want to praise my way,

Into the throne room.

You make me want to enter Your gates,

With thanksgiving.

And to enter Your courts,

With praise.

 

O, to dwell here,

In the place of praising You,

In the place of Your presence,

And never leave!

 

For a day in Your courts,

Is worth all the heartbreak and tears,

It takes,

To get here.

 

A day in Your courts,

Is worth,

A thousand,

A million,

A lifetime of days,

Elsewhere.

 

And it’s worth it to journey,

And to strive and to struggle,

To enter and abide,

In Your place of rest.

 

It’s worth it to give up all this that presses,

And tempts,

And blinds,

So that I can have,

Your presence.

 

Your presence is my treasure.

 

And O, how the world,

Seeks to blind me to that!

And O, how the devil,

Seeks to discourage me,

From hoping for it.

From seeking after it.

 

O, how my enemies,

Seek to make me doubt and forget,

Your face!

 

And when I cry out for Your presence,

And Your fellowship,

In the night,

When I cry out for Your touch,

And demand that despair and deception release me,

And give me my birthright,

Fellowship with Your presence,

And all the joy and riches found there,

 

My enemies mock me,

And speak lies to me.

Tell me there is no joy,

Nor birthright,

To be found.

 

They lie to me,

And tell me that there is no hope,

Of joy in Your presence here.

They hide You from my eyes,

With all their lies,

And deception.

 

They paint pictures of life,

That are not true.

Warp and torment my mind,

So that the truth which holds me,

And the God who stands by me,

Are not what I see.

But I see a dark and chaotic and distorted,

Way of life.

 

My enemies,

Speak lies to me,

And that,

In my own voice.

And I feast on their deception,

And see You not.

 

And my heart bends and twists,

And I feel so far from knowing You,

That truly it must be impossible,

For You to fellowship with me.

And truly I must have deceived myself,

Into believing in Your fellowship.

For this place of my mind,

Feels nothing at all,

Like the purity of Almighty God.

 

And deep within me,

With all the small strength,

I still have,

I cling to promises.

I fight for breath.

 

I confess truth,

Spit it out into the wind,

Yet it seems to fall like lead at my feet.

Seems to blow back into my face,

And mock me.

 

“Does that feel true to you?”

The darkness asks.

“Do you see your God anywhere?

No, He has left you alone.

He has abandoned you,

For you are filthy to Him.”

 

I’m looking at the world,

And my own soul,

Reflected in a fun-house mirror,

And I’m getting nauseous.

 

I feel like Alice,

Lost in some hallucinogenic,

And malevolent wonderland.

My mind reels and rocks with so many colors and shapes,

That make no sense,

And make me sick to my stomach.

 

Lost in a twister of lies and distorted colors,

Lost in a rabbit hole of confusion and chaos,

So dizzy my head throbs,

And I’m sick to my stomach,

Ready to vomit,

And die,

I make feeble attempts,

To grasp truth through the mire.

 

I pick up my sword,

Slippery and covered in so much thick ooze,

And with weak muscles,

I half-heartedly thrust and slice.

 

Feeble with weakness,

Despair leaning its heavy weight upon me,

I muster up my small courage,

And hold out sword point.

Keep enemies just far enough away,

That I can suck air into deflated lungs,

And gasp a quick breath.

 

But my enemies,

Seem so much stronger than me,

And they have more numbers,

And they close in.

 

And it seems that all I can do,

Is thrust them back a step,

For just a moment,

So that I can gasp,

Some air.

 

And so the conflict wears on.

World spinning,

Colors running,

Stomach churning,

Lungs burning,

Sword wobbling,

Enemies taunting,

The battle spins on.

 

Until I fall to my knees,

And dig my fingers into the earth,

And let the conflict swirl around me,

As the tears flow and I open wide my tender soul,

To the Lord of the battle,

Whose horn I hear,

Far away and muffled in the distance.

 

Far away in some deep place,

Inside my own soul,

Muted by so much emotion,

And so many lies,

And fears.

 

But I hear it,

Through my half-deaf ears.

Deep within my battered body,

My spirit hears,

And the weak heart,

Gives up a faint cry,

Of recognition.

 

And it’s just loud enough,

To reach my busy mind.

And at the spirit’s urging,

I drop to knees,

In response.

 

The Lord of the battle is calling,

And I bow my knees,

In obeisance.

 

The Lord of the battle reigns here,

And I fall to my knees,

And cry tears.

These, the only words to Him,

I know.

 

My deepest tears,

My plea for help.

And with these tears,

I communicate to Him,

A million thoughts.

And I lay bare before Him,

All the progress of the battle,

And all that I have offered in defense.

 

He blows His horn,

And deep and distant,

I hear it.

And I kneel on the battlefield,

Heedless of all the raging conflict,

And I weep.

 

I sit there on my knees,

Silently communing with my Lord,

Far away.

And the enemies near,

Spit and hiss and mock,

And breathe their filth and miasma,

In my face.

 

But they touch me not.

Their words ring in my ears,

And in my chest,

But they pierce me not.

For I hear the Lord of the battle,

And His presence,

Shields my chest.

 

So I sit,

And I dig my hands deep,

And He stirs my soul,

To rise up,

And fight.

 

And feebly,

With stumbling at first,

I do.

 

I take steps.

I stand up.

I confess grace.

 

And my muscles gain strength,

And I’m actually able to stand,

And not collapse.

I’m able to walk,

And not faint.

 

Deep within me,

This human spirit is translated,

Into the courts of heaven,

And it sees and tells of wonderful things,

That I know not.

 

My spirit speaks to me,

Of things I have not seen or known,

And my spirit preaches grace and truth to me,

And I am revived.

 

The Lord of the battle,

Strengthens me from within my own chest.

And His Spirit burns deep here,

And at last,

The darkness lifts,

And I see it.

 

Oil of God,

Still burning within.

And the light has not gone out,

The fire has not been quenched.

 

Hidden behind the miasma,

I had seen it not.

Yet as the Spirit blows its wind,

And clears the chaos away,

I see the candle still burning,

And I rejoice.

 

I am home.

 

The light burns to show me,

The warm hearth,

And the way home.

 

Home to the holy place within my own skin.

Home to the throne room,

And the communing place,

And the courts of my God,

In my breast.

 

Home to the tent of God,

Where the candle burns,

To welcome me.

Home to this place in Him,

Where I have been invited,

To dwell.

 

I see the candle,

And my heart comes home,

To the tent of my God.

To His dwelling place here.

 

You are God Almighty,

Who fills me with a million songs.

And my heart is overwhelmed,

At the sheer magnitude of You.

 

You are God Almighty,

Who delivers me,

Who sets my feet upon a rock,

And I am breathing in Your deliverance,

And victory,

And peace,

And I can scarcely believe how You have turned the tide.  

 

God Almighty,

Who is my victory.

Who delivers me from the snare of the enemy,

And plucks my feet out of the sinking mire,

That I cannot climb out of,

Myself.

 

God Almighty,

Who never leaves me or forsakes me,

But who is with me,

Right in the middle of the battle.  

 

God Almighty,

Who does not forsake me in weakness,

Nor leave me to die,

When my strength is spent.

 

But You are God who plucks me out,

And revives me,

And causes me to drink,

And to refresh myself,

From Your river of delights.  

 

You are God who comes to me,

And fills me with all the joy of heaven,

In Your presence.

 

You are God who comes and thrills my soul,

With Your fellowship,

And Your consolation,

And encouragement.

 

You are God Almighty,

Who opens wide the heavens,

And bids me feast.  

 

You are God Almighty,

Who makes the heavens,

My inheritance.

And Your fellowship forever,

Is the treasure at the end of the road,

I’m walking toward.  

 

And it’s worth all the struggles,

Uphill in the mud,

And all the wrestling with self,

And discouragement,

And temptations of this world,

And accusations and torments of the devil.

 

It’s worth every tear,

Every sacrifice,

Every correcting and pruning and molding into righteousness,

In my deepest parts.

 

It’s worth every single moment,

And every single battle,

Just to dwell in Your courts,

Forever.  

 

And in this world,

I fight to enter,

And to stay,

And to rest here.

 

I strive to stay in the rest,

And joy,

Of Your fellowship.  

 

I seek after peace,

And pursue it,

Hard.

With all that I have in me.  

 

I fight for joy,

With all that I have.

Joy in Your presence,

My chiefest desire.  

 

I fight to rest in You here,

Knowing that one day,

I will dwell in Your courts forever,

And there will be no more striving,

To stay there.

 

But rest will be,

The norm of heaven.

And I will at last enter into the full Sabbath rest,

And cease from all these uphill labors.

 

And it’s worth it now,

To rest in You.

Because I live and survive,

No other way.  

 

And it’s worth it to know,

That the fullness of the kingdom coming,

At the end of this road,

Is all joy with You forever.

And no more striving,

And nothing but,

Fullness of worship and fellowship and joy in You,

Forevermore.

~Selah~

 

God of heaven,

Who thrills my soul,

I rejoice in You.  

And I could sing of Your goodness and glory,

Forever.

 

And if You give me breath,

And song in my breast,

I will.

I will sing forever.

 

For when You visit with Your presence,

The heart can do nothing else.

And when I feast on Your fellowship,

I am undone,

And I cannot contain my heart’s swelling,

At You.

 

God Almighty,

High God of heaven,

Who gives Himself in fellowship,

To human souls.

 

I think about it,

And I can scarcely breathe.

Yet this is the reality,

I’m breathing in,

Right now.

 

And this is the reason,

My heart wants to burst.

Because I cannot contain this.

But it is too great and too marvelous for me.

Truly.

 

High God of heaven,

Thank You for trials and frustration.

Thank You for battles.

Thank You for this gift that You give us,

Letting us wrestle and strive,

In this holy place of communion,

With You.

 

For God Almighty,

You could perfect us in an instant.

And all that is still imperfect in us,

Could be perfected,

With one single word from You.

With one single glance at You.

 

But You choose not to perfect us in this way.

No, but in Your goodness,

You allow us to struggle and to wrestle,

And to choose You.

So that when You bring forth the fruit of righteousness in our souls,

You can reward us for our part,

In choosing You.

 

And when You bring forth the harvest,

You will look at the fruit that You have created and brought forth,

And call it ours.

~Selah~

 

This which Your own hand has done,

From first to last,

You will count,

As the fruit,

Of our labor.

 

O, give us eyes to see,

That this labor,

Is a gift!

For it is our opportunity,

To choose You,

And to be partners with You,

In the work of righteousness,

That You are doing.

 

This labor,

Is a gift to us.

A chance to choose You,

And one day be rewarded in Your presence,

For our choice.

~Selah~

 

You who does all this,

From first to last,

And brings us into it,

I marvel at You,

And I rejoice,

At the goodness of You.

 

God Almighty,

Who delivers me,

And who alone is the victory,

Yet who puts my name on the fruit,

Simply by virtue of my choosing,

To call out Your name.

 

Jesus Christ,

Who is my victory.

Your victory on the cross,

The victory for all saints,

Of all times.

 

God Almighty,

Who makes me a trophy,

Of Christ’s victory.

And my sins are forgiven for His name’s sake.

And in Christ I have been made strong,

And the word of Christ abides in me,

And I have overcome the evil one.

 

Jesus Christ who is my victory.

Lord of the battle,

And the glory that sets on fire,

All the tongues of the saints,

And the melody of heaven,

That inspires a million songs.

 

And we can never come close to grasping,

The melody of You.

But we move our hearts,

And we sing our songs,

Of worship and praise to You,

And we give You,

All that our souls can give.

 

And we just want to keep giving more,

Just want to keep singing more,

Because the reality of the God of heaven,

The Son of God whom we sing about,

Is far greater than our words portray.

 

So we sing higher,

And we dig deeper,

And we dance faster,

And we cry louder,

That we might attain,

More of the fullness of the Son of God,

And make Him seen and known,

In all His glory.

 

Son of God,

Your fellowship here,

Is greater than words can say.

You are greater than I,

Yet You abide here with me.

And I am undone,

As I ponder Your fellowship,

And Your person,

All the day.

~Selah~

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